Things I Would Tell my 20 year old Self #1 – Lisa

There are lots of things I wish for. A self-cleaning bathroom. Ridiculous stuff that I don’t actually need. A fourth season of Veronica Mars. For the Filet O’ Fish to suddenly be good for you. Time Travel. I’d happily give up all the gold plated toys in the world for my very own time-machine. I’d use it to go back to the early 2000’s, find my younger self and tell her a bunch of things I wish someone had told me when I was twenty. I’d also give her a hug & tell her “Don’t worry, everything is going to be OK

What would you say to your younger self if you had the chance?

Today, I’m really excited to have Lisa the Editor-in-Chief of The Hip & Urban Girl’s Guide answering this very question. I admire Lisa for several reasons. Not only is she a savvy entrepreneur, she’s also super friendly, poised and lovely! I’m really happy she offered to guest blog today. I hope you enjoy reading her insights as much as I did!

{PS. If you missed it, Tuesday I was blogging over at The Hip Urban Girl’s Guide & dishing about some of my favorite beauty products}

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The way I feel at 30 is the polar opposite of how I felt when I was 20.

My 20-something self was a lost, people-pleaser that was more concerned with being liked above anything else. Girls are generally raised to be nice, not necessarily assertive and though I was goal-oriented, by vision was fuzzy and a little naive. Here’s what I would have told my 20 year-old self:

1) Set Reasonable Goals – Yes you can aim for the world, but break your goal down to small attainable steps to lead you towards what your bigger vision is for yourself. The point is to not set yourself up for failure, so you beat yourself up and not start over. It really is about small steps. What do you have to do next to get to where you want to be?

2) Forget About Being Liked – People should like you for who you are. If they don’t, too bad – that’s their lost. I wasted a lot of my 20s worrying about being liked. Spend that energy thinking about what you want. No one else is going to do this for you.

3) Have a Social Life – Surround yourself with only positive, fun and supportive people. Extra points if they are like-minded and share similar goals. High school is over, so it’s time to distance yourself from any friends who are negative, bring you down or really is a frenemy. The place (high school) that brought you together as friends, no longer exists. So seek out new people who you like. Life is too short, so live hard and live well.

4) No One is Perfect – OK this one is so cliched, but it deserves to be said over and over again. Stop striving for perfection! You’ll drive yourself crazy and not fully be able to stop and really enjoy being in the moment. A better goal is to aim to be happy.

5) Don’t Be a Doormat – If you don’t want to do something, say no. Some people will try to take advantage of you and use you. Eliminate time-wasters and stop getting sucked into things you don’t want to do. Say no. The world won’t end and life will go on. Always go with your gut.

I wish I had could take the confidence I have now at 30, cut it half and share some with myself at 20. However, without the journey of stupid mistakes and life lessons – I wouldn’t be where I am now at 30.

What do you guys think? What would you love to tell your 20-year old (or younger) self?

 

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