Last month, I had the pleasure of interviewing pop star Lily Allen about her recent collaboration with luxe sex toy brand Womanizer for The Toronto Sun.
The result of this partnership is the Womanizer Liberty by Lily Allen – a small, lightweight edition of the classic Womanizer sex toy which uses patented and revolutionary Pleasure Air Technology designed to stimulate the sensitive nerve endings of the clitoris with gentle air waves.
Since the folks at Womanizer sent me my own Liberty by Lily Allen to try, I thought it was only fair that I test the wares and report back.
It goes without saying that there’s no shortage of options when it comes to the sheer variety of sex toys that are currently available for purchase.
The Liberty takes everything I love about Womanizer toys and wraps it up in a fun, accessible packaging. The Liberty model comes with a magnetic cap and six intensity levels, simple two-button operation and is feather-light, perfect for travel and discreet in handbags. Oh and those air waves. You simply have to place the toy above your clitoris and the Liberty will literally blow & suck you away to a quick, intense orgasm.
Made of body safe materials and fully rechargeable, the Liberty is also water resistant.
While the Liberty doesn’t have as many bells and whistles as some of their Womanizer Premium (which I also own and is fantastic), but in this case I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I love the Liberty because it’s so compact and unlike some of the other models, fits easily in your palm in a way that feels very ergonomic.
It also has incredibly simple and intuitive control buttons that are easy to find and use without having to stop what you’re doing & fumble around.
For these reasons, Liberty is a great entree into the Womanizer line and air pleasure toys in general.
The only thing I don’t love about the Liberty is the charging situation. As you can see from the diagram below the charging cord attaches magnetically to a port along the curved edge of the toy. You have to lay the toy *just so* in order to ensure the port connects and stays connected, which isn’t always possible when you’re the kind of person who likes to discretely hide their toys away while they’re charging.
I really wish WOW Tech (the parent company of Womanizer) would stop making toys like this. The toys are awesome, but the charging ports are way too finicky for my liking. With that being said, I still really like this toy because of it’s very travel friendly (the magnetic cap is something I didn’t even realize I needed in my life) and easy to use.
Have you tried the Liberty? What did you think?
The Womanizer Liberty is available at Lovehoney and retails for $99.99 USD. If you purchase any products through the affiliate links in this post, I may receive a small commission which I will use to buy Joe the Intern more shorts.
Through Skinny Dip I’ve been able to sort through my feelings about dating, relationships, my body and my sexuality. While I’ve mostly retired from reviewing sex toys and no longer feel the need to share so much about my current love life on this blog, I still thought it would be fun to look back and share some of the things I’ve learned about myself over the past nine years (oof) of blogging.
1. Explore and experiment to your heart’s content.
I thought I had a pretty good handle on my body and self-pleasure before I started this blog, but trying a bazillion different sex toys for the purpose of writing about them has definitely expanded that knowledge in positive ways. I can now look at the shape of a toy or feel it’s vibration patterns on my fingers and make a very good educated guess as to whether I’ll enjoy it (and while I’m occasionally still surprised, I’m usually right). The point here: don’t be afraid to experiment with different gadgets or props — even the really weird looking sex toys. Worst case scenario, you’ll learn more about what you do and don’t like.
2. If you don’t like something or it doesn’t work for you, that doesn’t mean you’re broken.
There are plenty of stores online that claim they sell the best sex machines but not all toys are created equal or are designed with every human body in mind. What’s mind blowing for one person, is going to be a flop for someone else. For example, I’ve learned through trial and error that wand vibes like the ever popular Hitachi Magic Wand, just don’t work for me AT ALL. I’d much rather use something small and precise like the Crave Duet (a vibe that another blogger hailed as a flop). Long story short: not everything is going to work for everyone and that’s okay. Life would be kind of boring if everyone got off in the exactly same way. Keep trying stuff until you find what works for you.
3. You’re not required to define your sexuality for other people.
When I decided last spring to finally explore my bi-sexuality, I felt pressure to define my sexuality for other people. I thought it would be easier to explain myself and fit in with the queer community if I gave myself a label (queer, bi, hetero-flexible etc) — and I wasn’t totally wrong about the first one. People like clearly defined labels because they’re easier to digest. However, like Justin Bobby from The Hills, “I’m just not into labels” — at least when it comes to my sexuality. It wasn’t until I was on my first really great date with a woman and my date told me, “no one in the gay community is going to force you to define yourself,” that I felt comfortable just letting things be. The truest thing I can say about my sexuality is that I am a woman who mostly dates and loves men, but sometimes has romantic and sexual feelings for women.
4. You know yourself better than anyone else and it’s okay to like what you like, however kinky or vanilla that may be.
I’ve written about the ridiculous assumptions people have about me because I write about sex. For example, that I must be super kinky and/or sleep with evvvvveryone (I mean, really guys?) Nine years in and I’m really tired of having to explain on a weekly basis that I don’t have my very own sex dungeon (however, I’d kill for some more shoe storage space). While writing about sex has definitely opened my mind to new things and encouraged me to explore my sexuality, it’s also helped reconfirm what I’ve known to be true about myself all along: that I can enjoy different kinds of sexual experiences, but the kind I crave most isn’t necessarily very kinky. I want sex that is super passionate, but also includes a great mind-body/emotional connection. This isn’t always easy to find, which is part of the reason I don’t have as much sex as people probably think I do. Like #3, I also used to feel the need to explain this to people, until I realized that it’s no one’s business but my own.
5. Stay open.
Not only am I more open-minded when it comes to my own desires, writing about sex has given me a greater appreciation for the diversity of human sexuality. While I know myself a lot better than I did nine years ago and I still have some “hard passes” when it comes to dating and sex, I’m also open to those beliefs and desires changing. Sexuality isn’t static. It’s okay to evolve and change over time. In other words, know yourself but never say never.
This post was brought to you by ChooseMattress.com. Thanks for supporting the posts that support Skinny Dip.
I found a sex related topic I haven’t written about yet: mattresses! I never considered the impact mattress comfort had on my sex life until I moved in with my ex-partner. I went from sleeping on a reasonably comfortable spring mattress to spending my nights atop of an Ikea foam mattress that I’m pretty sure was designed by Satan himself. Every morning I’d wake up with a sore back and achy muscles. I have a back injury and when my back doesn’t feel good, my libido suffers. When we finally made the switch and invested in a super comfy mattress, it had a positive impact on our sex life. (It’s amazing how much sexier you feel when you’re no longer living in a real-life version of the sofa bed episode of Seinfeld.)
So, without further adieu, here are a few pointers on how to choose the right mattress so your sex life never has to suffer.
When choosing a mattress for sex, comfort is one of the things you don’t want to mess around with. Anyone who’s ever had the unfortunate experience of having sex on a futon only to wake up the next day feeling like their body was put through a trash compactor, knows exactly what I’m talking about. The last thing you want is to strain your body while making love (this is especially true if you already have an injury like I do.) Some mattresses will strain your knees, buttocks, or hands, and other areas of your body that offer support during sex. When these are strained, you will get tired out more quickly and may even wake up to body pain. Look for a mattress that’s comfortable and supportive so that sex can be as pleasurable as possible — something that’s more difficult to achieve when you’re worried about your mattress giving you shin splints.
While most people have differing preferences when it comes to noise during sex, I think most of us can agree that there’s nothing sexy about a creaky, squeaky mattress. This is especially true if you live with other people and want to keep things, um, discreet. Instead, aim to create an environment that allows you to focus on your partner with minimal distractions. By providing comfort and discretion, a quiet mattress will help increase performance and pleasure for both of you.
To maintain rhythm and endurance you’ll want to make sure your mattress offers sufficient bounce. A rigid base may not offer this. When you don’t have enough bounce, your partner will feel like they’re being pressed into the mattress — and not in a good way. So, make sure you find a mattress with sufficient bounce for maximum pleasure.
When choosing a mattress to bolster your sex life, you also need to think about edge support — the encasement around the frame that spring mattresses require to support the springs. A good mattress will offer sufficient edge support to ensure safety and comfort, and will be designed to accommodate weight and pressure, without collapsing (I’m not sure what that would look like, but it doesn’t sound fun). Instead of worrying about stuff, a good mattress allows you to focus on what’s important: great sleep and satisfaction from sex.
So, there you have it. If you’re shopping for a mattress with sex in mind, these tips should help. Think about it: the average person sleeps for one third of their life (if you sleep approx 8 hours a night and live for 75 years, that’s 25 years or 9,125 days that you spend asleep). You owe it to yourself to create the perfect refuge and playground for you and your partner(s) with a good mattress.
Last month I spent five hilarity filled, sun-soaked days at Temptation Resort, Cancun – a topless optional, “playground for grownups.” The adult-themed resort recently underwent 11 months of extensive, multi-million dollar renovations and a complete rebuild, lead by world-renowned designer Karim Rashid (you may own his garbage can). The result is a luxurious, ultra-modern and playful candy coloured space that makes you feel like you’re temporarily living in a pack of Jolly Ranchers.
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When I agreed to go on this trip, I wasn’t really sure what to expect. I had a lot of questions, concerns, and just general curiosities. I recently wrote about my Temptation experience in the Toronto Sun. However, I thought it would be useful to put together a post that answers FAQs.
Going to Temptation for your first time? Here are a few things you should know:
1. Going topless is completely optional.
Believe it or not, I’m actually pretty shy about showing my body in public. I was concerned that I’d get to the resort and be the only person hanging out by the pool fully covered. Turns out, I had nothing to worry about. Going topless is completely optional. Some people are topless, others are not. Whatever your comfort level, no one judges you (I even rocked a one-piece while hanging out on the beach!)
2. You will see boobs. Lots of boobs.
It’s kind of inevitable. Within my first 20 minutes at Temptation, I looked across the pool and saw a woman vigorously applying sunscreen to her very ample breasts. These kinds of moments become so commonplace that they kind of stop registering after the first day or so. Also, good call re the sunscreen. Apparently burnt nipples are not much fun.
Temptation is an “adult-centric, superior all-inclusive, topless-optional resort” designed to be a “playground for adults” aged 21+ who “love to party in a free-spirited atmosphere.” While Temptation is very clear that it’s not a Swingers resort, you will meet guests who consider themselves Swingers or Lifestyle (however, as one couple I spoke to told me with a wink, “we’re not swingers but some of the people we sleep with are“).
Everyone has their own reasons for coming to Temptation. Some folks just want to go topless and love the laid-back, friendly vibe. Other guests are there to spice up their relationship and/or test boundaries (even if they’re not actively trying to hook up with anyone, there’s the possibility that it may happen and sometimes that’s enough.) And of course, there are also people (like me) who just want to chill by the pool and eat as much guacamole as possible, with zero judgment. However you cut it, if you have a freak flag, this is the perfect place to fly it.
4. The crowd is older.
Although the resort is actively trying to bring in more millennial-aged guests, for the most part, the crowd is late their 20’s to early 30’s and up. The price point is a bit higher than a generic resort, so that tends to attract a more mature and established crowd. While I met a lot of people in their 30’s and early 40’s, there are also lots of guests in their 60’s and 70’s!
5. The vibe is very body positive.
Without really advertising it as such. You will see bodies of all different shapes, sizes, and ages in various stages of undress. There’s no judgment. There’s no shame. Everyone is just doing their thing. If you’re tired of worrying about what you look like in a bathing suit, this is the perfect place to go. By the end of my stay, I felt a renewed sense of acceptance and love towards my own bod.
I know it seems counter intuitive to come back from a sexy adult themed resort and want to talk about the food, but it was really quite excellent. With seven different specialized restaurants on the property, there’s a little bit of everything. My favorite restaurant overall was Sea Flirt. I loved their Mexican inspired breakfasts and modern seafood dinners. Dinner at Romanza (high-end Italian) was also excellent. Other favorites include the cheese empanadas and taco dorados at Rain (buffet), the guacamole & ceviche at Amores (Mexican/American) and basically all of the desserts. Also, bottomless fresh squeezed juices at breakfast!
Although it says all tips are included, the staff is really lovely and you’ll want to tip them. It’s just good form. I’d budget $20 USD/per day on tips.
8. You can easily plug in your phone and electronics in your room.
I thought I’d have to bring an adapter/travel plug set, but it turns out you don’t need one for Mexico. Inside the rooms at Temptation Cancun you’ll find these cute little nooks built into the wall on either side of the bed where you can easily plug in all your electronics. Also, no need to bring a straightening iron – there’s one in every bathroom.
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9. The gift shop sells Cialis and Viagra but may not carry items like gum and bobby pins.
I learned this the hard way (heh, pun not intended). Luckily there’s a drugstore directly across the street from the hotel where you can get all kinds of things — including deeply discounted over-the-counter skin products (Retin A, Kitocell) without a prescription. FYI, you cannot buy Xanax or Adderall without a prescription. I asked…for a friend.
10. Ordering room service off the TV is kind of amazing.
There’s a fancy, schmancy digital room service system that you can access through your TV. It’s 24-hours and all-inclusive. Perfect for those late night chips and guacamole cravings.
11. There are two pools, each with a distinctly different vibe.
The “sexy pool” is the party pool where things can get pretty wild, whereas the “quiet pool” is exactly what it sounds like: mellow and laid-back. I liked having a choice between the two.
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12. There’s an unofficial message board where guests can connect.
Many guests come back every year or even multiple times a year, so it makes sense that they have their own message board. Cancun Care is a place where guests can connect, arrange meetups and talk about their experiences. It’s also where you can sign up for The Boob Cruise. Yes, that’s totally a thing and it’s exactly what it sounds like.
13. You will see and hear things that can’t be unseen/heard.
While on the way to our first dinner together, our group of journalists passed by a group of people partying completely nude on their balcony. While sexual activity is prohibited in public spaces, you will see things. Some of the things we witnessed: A very large man in a very tiny man-thong. The beginnings of what looked like a foursome popping off in the pool. An underwater blow-job/hand-job. More men in thongs. To quote my friend Laura, “my eyes will never be the same.”
14. If hooking up with a couple is on your sexual bucket list, this is a good place to turn that fantasy into a reality.
Not every couple at Temptation is there to hook up (see above), but if you’re looking for that kind of connection, this is a good place to meet other people who are open to it. Even if you’re not looking to “play,” you’ll probably get hit on — or at the very least checked out – by a couple. Everyone is really respectful though, so if you’re not into it, it’s totally OK to politely decline.
15. Temptation is an environment of consent and respect.
The hardest thing to get used to about Temptation is how decidedly UN-creepy it all is. There is a strict “no means no” policy that’s built into the Temptation Cancun resort guidelines that every guest has to sign off on upon check-in. People will ask you before they touch you — even if it’s just a hug.
16. If you’re a light sleeper and like to go to bed early, bring some earplugs.
The music from the outdoor nightclub Bash, usually winds down around 2 am. Depending on where your room is located, you might be able to hear it when you’re trying to sleep. If you’re a light sleeper (like I am) and tend to go to bed early, you might want to bring along a pair of earplugs.
17. You will make friends.
This trip was the first time since my #BiSC days where I went somewhere and felt like I met my people. I was lucky enough to go to Temptation with 8 other amazing, hilarious journalists. We started as strangers but ended the trip as friends. With that said, I feel like many of the returning guests would say the same thing about their Temptation experience. When asked what they love about Temptation, everyone says “the people.” Everyone is really friendly and open, so it’s incredibly easy to strike up conversations with strangers.
Maybe it was the amazing people I met, the daily breakfast enchiladas I consumed or the sheer ridiculousness of it all (where else can you find a poolside “orgasm faking contest” or dance half-naked to Billy Ocean’s Carribean Queen while enjoying the best the swim-up bar has to offer?) but in just a few short days, Temptation managed to turn me from a skeptic into a believer.
Real talk: your body starts to go through some interesting changes in your 30’s. I’ve gained weight, lost weight, dealt with adult acne, finally cured said acne—the list goes on. The latest phenomenon to add to my ever-growing list of body changes: hormonal night sweats. I wake up drenched at least 4-5 nights per month. It’s disconcerting, it’s uncomfortable and, apparently, totally normal for someone my age. Has anyone else experienced these?
Another thing I’ve heard a lot about but haven’t experienced yet is vaginal dryness. I’ve written a lot about the benefits of lube in the bedroom, but what if you just feel dry on a day to day basis?
I firmly believe that in order to feel good in our bodies, we need to be able to have open, honest conversations about them—even about the stuff that may seem less than sexy. So, today I’ve teamed up with Vagisil to get the conversation started.
Although vaginal dryness doesn’t currently affect me at this point in my life, I do have some women in my life who have experienced issues with dryness following pregnancy and other hormonal changes. Here’s what we need to remember: experiencing vaginal dryness is also completely normal and nothing to be ashamed of.
I used to think that vaginal dryness was just a menopause issue, but actually, women of all ages can experience it at some time in their life. There are a bunch of potential causes of vaginal dryness, including:
Certain medications (like antihistamines and birth control pills)
Postnatal hormone shifts
More real talk: I have a long-standing relationship with Vagisil products. Years ago, when I first moved to Toronto as a somewhat wide-eyed 18-year-old and was living on my own for the first time, I experienced my first yeast infection. I remember calling my mom because I had no idea what was happening to my body (I think my exact words were, “Mom, I’m pretty sure I’m dying”). One of the first things she suggested was that I go pick up a tube of Vagisil® Extra Strength Anti-Itch crème. FYI: I wasn’t dying and the cream definitely provided some relief.
Vagisil recently launched ProHydrate Natural Feel Moisturizing Gel, a product designed to target vaginal dryness. With no added estrogen, perfumes, dyes or preservatives, it’s designed to give women a feeling of natural moisture, wherever and whenever, with a discreet and easy to use applicator.
So, what exactly is ProHydrate Natural Feel Moisturizing Gel? Good question. Basically, it’s a product designed to relieve dryness anytime and make sex more comfortable. Fast acting and long lasting, it has a unique bio-adherent formula that coats the vaginal wall to provide dryness relief instantly, then slowly releases moisture over time. It does this through a unique blend of moisturizers, including Hyaluronic Acids (HA’s), a naturally occurring hydrator found in skin, so it feels like your own natural moisture.
As we age, the percentage of Hyaluronic Acid in our skin decreases which can lead to dryness and fragility. Hyaluronic Acid is so effective that a tiny amount holds up to 1000 times its weight in water and it naturally attracts and retains moisture.
To provide continuous comfort you can use Vagisil® ProHydrate Natural Feel every three days.
“Sounds great, but how do I get the product where it needs to be?”
Anyone who’s used any kind of intimate lubricant knows that things can get, uh, messy fast. One of the things I think is really cool about the ProHydrate Natural Feel Moisturizing Gel is that it comes with single-use pre-filled applicator inserts (wrapped in tampon-like packaging) that effortlessly target the source of dryness. They’re easy to use and totally discreet.
I was also sent a few other products to check out:
Vagisil® pH Balanced wash.
Did you know that your period, tight clothes, sex, even body washes and soap can disrupt your pH balance? This gentle cleanser contains LactoPrebiotic to help support a healthy pH balance. If you’re like me and find a lot of body washes really irritating, this might be a good option for you.
Vagisil® Extra Strength Anti-Itch crème.
Ah yes, an old standby. Although I’ve been lucky and haven’t needed to use this product lately, it’s always a good one to keep handy just in case. Because, well, life with a vagina can be unpredictable.
So, while I don’t necessarily need to use all of these products currently, it’s really nice to know I have options from a brand I trust, if/when I need them in the future.
This post was sponsored by Vagisil. All opinions are my own, because that’s how I roll.