Sex Toy Shopping 101

I’ll admit, sometimes I feel like I live in a bit of a “blogger bubble” (aka my head). I spend a lot of time thinking about ideas for this blog, researching topics and having debates with myself about stuff like whether its a better investment to buy the Lelo Ina vibrator or just go for broke and upgrade to the Lelo Soraya. I spend a healthy amount of time thinking about sex or about pretty brightly colored objects that look like penises. Don’t be fooled, I look innocent but my mind is almost always in the gutter.

A few weekends ago, I was at a networking event with a bunch of other bloggers. I got into a discussion with a friend of mine about this blog and the conversation eventually turned to the topic of vibrators (hi. welcome to a typical Saturday afternoon). It wasn’t until she started to ask me some questions about various products that I had a “aha” moment: maybe not everyone obsesses over this stuff like I do! Maybe some of you don’t use toys. Or maybe some of you want to buy yourself some personal goodies but, don’t even know where to start. This is understandable. Sex stores can be intimidating, confusing places especially when, as we have already established, some sex toys are totally creepy looking and could be mistaken for seafood.

Anyway.

Recently, I wrote an article for 29secrets about the Do’s and Don’ts of Buying your First Sex Toy. I don’t usually re-post my freelance articles but, I thought this one might be useful.


This list is very basic. When it comes to toys, I am not an “expert” . Similar to my skiing ability, I’d classify myself as “intermediate”: I know what I enjoy but, I’m not doing any Black Diamond runs yet.

If you would like to continue the conversation, please leave a comment and I will respond or you can email me: skinnydipblog at gmail.com. If I can’t answer your question, I will refer you to some who can.

This segues perfectly into a story from last week:

The other day while I was out shopping, I decided to stop in at the Stag Shop near the Eaton Center to do some “research” for the next installment of When Sex Toys Go Hilariously Wrong. The few times I’ve visited the Stag Shop I’ve been pleasantly surprised by their customer service. If you go up to the second floor (past the sex swing display) you’ll find a pretty decent selection of higher end toys and a female staff that are friendly & know their stuff*

I was looking at the display of Vanity Vibrators by Jopen – a new line of high-end toys that I have been curious about. When I asked the person who was helping me a question, she said:

“If you don’t mind waiting, I can go grab you the demo model from the back room so that you can see the actual toy. We had to remove them all from the sales floor”

“Oh, why?”

“People kept stealing them”

Which, she then followed with “I mean, its understandable – this is downtown Toronto

Wait, let’s back up a minute. WHO STEALS THE DISPLAY MODEL OF A VIBRATOR?! I get that to people with sticky fingers display models must seem like the biggest tease. I mean, they are just there. I’m sure many kleptomaniacs have walked into places like Ikea or the Apple Store and said “I‘m just going to grab that MacBook/Billy bookcase and make a run for it bitches!” But, THIS IS A SEX TOY. Yes, it costs $300 but, its on display in the busiest, dirtiest, shopping district in city that I like to refer to as “Toronto’s Armpit”. Imagine all the dirty palms that have touched it. Ughhhhhhh. Are people using these toys?! Is some dude selling them out of his trunk in a parking lot in Scarborough?! OMG. SO MANY QUESTIONS I DON’T NEED ANSWERS TO. MAKE. THE. BAD. IMAGERY. STOP.

So, maybe I need to add to the list “actually purchase the toy.”

(and not from someone’s trunk)

Now that I have sufficiently educated & disturbed you all in the same blog post, HAPPY SATURDAY!

*If you do visit the store, ask for Cathy. She’s cool. No, they didn’t pay me to say this and yes, I’m fully aware that I’m now on a first name basis with my neighborhood sex store.

 

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