Between The Banker, the creepy single Dads that hit on me in Walmart and these dudes, it seems like all you ever get to read about on Skinny Dip is men behaving badly. I think it’s high time I told you a good story about dating (one that doesn’t end with me having to change my phone number). So here it is:
While I was in Toronto, I went on a date and it was awesome.
(CORRECTION: I actually went on three dates (with the same person) and they were all pretty fantastic.)
I met “Handsome Guy” about 2 years ago through mutual friends. We got along easily and had instant chemistry. The kind of chemistry that other people in the room can sense because it crackles in the air like electricity. Precisely the kind of chemistry you ignore when you’re already in a serious relationship with someone else. Handsome Guy got relegated into the “The Distant Facebook Friend Zone” – an obscure dimension Handsome Guys often get exiled to when girls already have boyfriends. Since I’ve been single I’ve allowed myself to indulge in a bit of a crush on Handsome Guy. After all, he’s charming, handsome and wears nice glasses. Let me just say, Handsome Guy has serious Clark Kent appeal.
Although I’ve been telling myself for months that I’m not ready to date anyone, when Handsome Guy asked me if I’d like to go to an art show with him while I was Toronto, I said yes.
A few days later we met for a drink. When I sat down, one of the first things I blurted out was:
“I’M LEAVING THE CITY IN 5 DAYS”
To which he replied, “Alright, I guess we’ll have to enjoy the time we have!”
When we got to the art show we had planned on attending, we discovered that it wasn’t a gallery exhibit, it was an adult “make your own art” event complete with a DJ and a make-shift bar.
We sat across from each other making paintings and sharing things about our lives. There were no awkward pauses in the conversation. Even when it came to our attention that my “South West inspired” drawing of a cactus really just looked like a giant penis, Handsome Guy gently teased me and I made a joke that unconscious phallic drawings are an occupational hazard of being a sex blogger.
(Although, I’m kind of concerned that my date persona as a 30-something is the female version of that kid from Superbad)
The event was in a chic loft space downtown. When we’d finished creating our masterpieces (I’d filled my canvas with lighting bolts and hearts, he’d managed to cleverly turn my penis/cactus drawing into a guitar which still kind of looked like a penis) we stepped out onto the loft’s fire-escape to get some air. The wrought iron railing of the fire escape was decorated with white Christmas lights and the downtown Toronto skyline shimmered in the background. This is when Handsome Guy kissed me.
It was one of those perfect romantic moments.
We ended the night as all great nights out in Toronto should end: by sharing late-night eats at a 24 hour Pho place in Chinatown.
He pulled out chairs, opened doors, helped me with my coat and after we finished eating, walked me to my subway stop the way a gentleman should.
When I got home I squeeled excitedly to my roommate:
“I went on a date with a hot guy…and it wasn’t horrible! In fact, he was the perfect gentleman!”
Date #2 included more of my favorite things: an oversized leisurely brunch, tacos, more kisses and a long walk through the Annex. I dragged Handsome Guy into my favorite used bookstore (that I can never leave empty handed) and he kindly carried my purchases all the way back to my friend’s place in Kensington Market.
Date #3 was bittersweet and involved Handsome Guy driving me to the airport to catch my flight home. Everything was going great until we arrived at the airport, checked my bags and were told that they were massively overweight. The Air Canada agent told us that we needed to re-pack the bags and/or remove items or they wouldn’t be able to accept them.
I was grateful when Handsome Guy volunteered to help with the re-packing however, I knew that once I unzipped those suitcases he’d be privy to all my secrets. I looked at him and said:
“In about 2 seconds you’re going to get to know me a lot better. Are you ready for that?”
I unzipped the suitcases and suddenly it was like the contents of my life had barfed all over Pearson International Airport. Everything was on display and I mean EVERYTHING.
Oddly enough, he didn’t seem phased by any of it.
We worked quickly and got my suitcases down to an acceptable weight. When I flung the largest suitcase back on the scale for what was hopefully the final weigh-in, the agent said to me:
“Looks like you’re good to go. I knew you guys could do it!”
Me: “Would you believe this is our third date?!”
Her: “You guys seem really good together”
I looked at Handsome Guy smiling back at me as he loaded my Prada tote bag overflowing with shoes and a big bag of vibrators back onto the luggage cart (to be shipped to me at a later date) and said:
“Yes, yes we do”
When Handsome Guy and I said goodbye at the gate I told him:
“Thank you for restoring my faith that there are good people out there”
To which he replied, “Thank YOU for restoring my faith”
A few days after I arrived home in BC, I finally decided to crack open the book I had purchased to read on the airplane and out fell an envelope. It was a card from Handsome Guy wishing me a safe trip home & letting me know how much he had enjoyed the time we spent together. He must have slipped it in my bag sometime between arriving at the airport and kissing me goodbye. I smile every time I see the card sitting on my dresser.
Ever since the break-up my heart and sexuality have been on lock-down. I’ve been telling myself that I’m just not ready to get close to anyone (and for a long time this was true). However, before I went to Toronto I had recently graduated to saying “Maybe in 6 months I’ll be ready for a fling but not before then” I saw dating as something I’d do in the distant future however, things don’t always go as planned. Even though I’ve been telling myself that I am not ready for anything, I was so, so ready for this. I was ready to feel sexy again. I was ready to enjoy spending time with someone who enjoys spending time with me. Now that I’m back on the other side of the country I don’t know what the future holds for Handsome Guy and I, but I’m really grateful for the time we’ve been able to spend together.
I was ready to get my groove back.
This is all to say…
Women: Even though this blog often suggests otherwise, there are good guys out there – guys who are sexy AND thoughtful and who’ll hold doors open for you (if you are into that kind of thing… which I am)
Men: Take note, this is how it’s done.
So, now that I sort of feel like I’m back in the blogging groove, what did I miss? What’s new with you guys?! Tell me something good!