Hey dudes, Joe the Intern here. Some of you have been requesting more posts that feature dating advice for men. Unfortunately, I haven’t been going on many dates lately – my girlfriend Milly left me to go on what she describes as a “sexual walkabout” with Malibu Ken – I mean, I get it. He has a beach cabana and I live in a bachelor apartment located in a filing cabinet. So, lately I’ve just been having a lot of feelings and practicing my Krav Maga moves. Anyway, I brought in my friend Joshua Pompey to provide some dating tips for the dudes. You might remember him from his instalment of the Things I’d Tell My 20-year Old Self series. Take it away Joshua!
The day is finally here. You somehow managed to meet a single, attractive, funny, and sane woman online, and now she has agreed to meet you in person. What comes next? Panic. Sweat. Heavy Breathing. Once all of that passes, remember these 6 tips and you’ll have that second date planned in no time.
1. Arrive Early
There’s an old saying in the military “If you’re on-time, you’re late.” I’m not saying to arrive for your 8 PM dinner date at 5 PM and take advantage of happy hour(s), but planning to arrive 20 minutes early will ensure success. Even if you lose 10 minutes because of traffic because you get lost, or because it takes a while to find a parking spot for your massive SUV, you’ll still have another 10 minutes to spare. The last thing you want to do is keep her waiting.
2. Dress Appropriately
Where are you going? If the first date is at a park for a picnic, don’t wear a suit. If you’re meeting at a fancy restaurant, leave the sandals at home next to your superman tie. The best trick is to go to a department store, find a pretty saleswoman, and ask her for help. Let her know you are going on a first date and chances are she will set you up nicely. If you cannot afford to buy something new, make sure you’re comfortable in what you pick out of your closet. A woman can tell a lot from a man by his clothes.
Never underestimate the power of a smile. There’s just something about this odd facial expression that helps people connect with each other. From the very first time you meet and at times throughout the conversation you must always remember to smile. A real smile will engage the entire face, the cheeks, and the eyes. A fake smile will make it look like you’re holding in a fart. So unless you’re lactose intolerant and out for ice cream with your sweetie, let her know you’re happy to be with by showing her your real smile.
4. Shut Up and Listen.
Speak to a seasoned sales-person and ask them the best tactic for making a sale. They will tell you “Listening to the customer’s needs.” The same can be true for personal relationships and when the product you are selling is yourself. A woman who feels she can open up to a man because he truly listens to her is going to become more interested and comfortable at a much quicker pace. Spewing out stories of how you and your buddies “Got so wasted” or receipting lines from every episode of Entourage is probably not going to keep her interested in you. Listening is a skill not owned by many. Master it and you will be ahead of the curve.
5. Treat Others Nicely
When she sees how nice you are to the waiter, to the cab driver, to the other couple who you held the door for, she will notice you more. She is an extension of you, and when others thank you and recognize you as a gentleman, she will feel part of that recognition.
6. Always Pay, But Do It The Right Way
Let’s be honest – the man pays. Women will tell you that they are equal (which they are) and can also pay. The right thing to do, the chivalrous thing to do, and the impressive thing to do is to pay for your woman during a date. Let her offer to pay at which time you can politely thank her and say “It’s my pleasure.”
The first date can be a nerve-tingling experience, one surely to leave you hot under the collar. If you follow these 6 tips for success not only will you impress your woman but you’ll leave her asking for more by the time the night is over. And if not, there’s always that pretty saleswoman at the department store!
Joshua has successfully been helping online daters find love since 2009. For more great dating advice from Joshua, visit jpompey.com, or click here now for a free article on how to write a great online dating opener.